We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.
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about

Name: Milk Man
AKA: Gilbert Evans
Story: Gilbert had a very unhealthy obsession with milk. After he saw the movie The Fly, he began building a machine that would mix his DNA with milk. His machine worked. He became a man of milk; every pore in his body constantly excretes milk. He bottled his milk and sold it under the guise of an innocent salesperson. When people drink it, they slowly liquify into sour milk.

lyrics

Hey, little boy.
Would you like some milk?
Hello, mam.
Would you like some milk?
Hi there, little girl.
I bet you need some milk.
Good afternoon, sir.
I have milk for sale. The price is reasonable.

Chorus:
Why won’t you buy my milk? Buy it.
It’s good for you, it is. It’s milk.
You need to drink my milk. Drink it.
I always say, dairy daily. Dairy. Daily.

Well, hello, my good neighbor.
Can I interest you in some milk?
Howdy, partner.
Are you thirsty for milk?
Fine day, don’t you think?
Only milk could make this day finer.
You look thirsty.
You need milk.

Chorus:
Please. Please buy milk from me. Buy it.
You need to drink this milk. Drink it. Drink it.
I won’t ask again. Will you take this milk? Take it.
It’s always a dairy day. Dairy daily. Dairy daily.

credits

from Villains Amongst Us, released March 22, 2023
Written, performed, engineered, mixed, produced, mastered by Dwight Schenk.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Dwight Schenk Oshawa, Ontario

5 of these things are true:
1. Wrote a symphony premiered by the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra.
2. Was a carnie for a summer.
3. Has the world record for tree-chopping (30" diameter).
4. Wrote and illustrated a graphic novel.
5. Wrote a letter to Marineland asking them to change their song because 'not everyone loves Marineland".
6. Has been in many bands in the Toronto area.
... more

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