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A cover/re-working of the King Missile song "Detachable Penis".

lyrics

Stan woke up this morning in a lot of pieces
And his penis was missing again
This happens all the time but it’s attachable
It comes in handy a lot of the time
Stan can leave it at home when he thinks it’s
gonna get him in trouble
or he can rent it out when he doesn’t need it
but now and then he goes to a party, gets drunk,
and the next morning can’t for the life of him remember
what he did with it
First, Stan looked around his apartment,
And he couldn’t find it
So he called up the place where the party was
They hadn’t seen it either
Stan asked them to check the medicine cabinet,
Cause for some reason he leaves it there sometimes,
But not this time
So he told them if it pops up to let him know
Stan called a few people who were at the party
But they were no help either
Stan was starting to get mildly annoyed
Stan really doesn’t like being without his penis for too long
It makes him feel like less of a man
I mean, his name is Stan the man
After a few hours of searching his house and calling everyone he could think of, Stan the not-whole man was getting very depressed
So he went to the bank and ate breakfast
Then, as he walked down Front Street towards St. Lawrence Market where some of the other pieces of Stan were hanging out,
Stan saw his penis lying on a blanket next to his broken jawbone
Some guy was selling them
Stan had to buy his penis off him
He wanted 220 but Stan talked to him down to 17
Stan took it home, washed it off,
And put it back on
He was happy again
Almost complete
People sometimes tell him he should stop blowing up and losing his penis
And Stan the man always tells them,
“Don’t worry. It’s attachable”

credits

from The Exploding Man, released July 1, 2021
Performed, mixed, produced by Dwight Schenk.
Lyrics by Dwight Schenk.
Originally written by King Missile.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Dwight Schenk image

Dwight Schenk Oshawa, Ontario

5 of these things are true:
1. Wrote a symphony premiered by the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra.
2. Was a carnie for a summer.
3. Has the world record for tree-chopping (30" diameter).
4. Wrote and illustrated a graphic novel.
5. Wrote a letter to Marineland asking them to change their song because 'not everyone loves Marineland".
6. Has been in many bands in the Toronto area. ... more

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